by Max Barry

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The Torn-Down Condominium of Cinnibar

“Goodnight, Everybody!” Yakko Warner

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Page

Location: The North Pacific

OverviewDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Cinnibar

Population21.741 billion

CapitalVacant Lot
LeaderYakko Warner
Faith$6 SRIMP SPECIAL

CurrencyNil
AnimalStallion

The Torn-Down Condominium of Cinnibar is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Yakko Warner with an even hand, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The compassionate, cheerful, devout population of 21.741 billion Clydes have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vacant Lot. The average income tax rate is 93.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Clydic economy, worth a remarkable 2,084 trillion Nils a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Gambling. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 95,890 Nils, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A handful of megacorporations own every "craft brewery" in the nation, 3D printed organs are a breath of new life for the sick and elderly, popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs, and immigrants who carry knives on them are presumed to be chefs. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cinnibar's national animal is the Stallion, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is $6 SRIMP SPECIAL.

Cinnibar is ranked 81,071st in the world and 1,604th in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 2,728.3 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 267thMost Influential: 791stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,415thTop
5%
Most Cheerful Citizens: 2,924thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,545thMost Cultured: 5,415thLargest Welfare Programs: 5,528thMost Advanced Public Education: 5,871stLongest Average Lifespans: 6,259thMost Pacifist: 6,579thBest Weather: 7,257thMost Rebellious Youth: 7,406thMost Beautiful Environments: 7,425thHighest Average Tax Rates: 7,516thHealthiest Citizens: 7,612thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 7,654thMost Advanced Public Transport: 7,700thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 7,731stHighest Food Quality: 7,815thMost Developed: 7,920thNicest Citizens: 9,810thMost Stationary: 9,932ndSmartest Citizens: 11,344thHighest Economic Output: 11,976thMost Inclusive: 13,457thLargest Populations: 13,607thMost Compassionate Citizens: 14,340thLowest Crime Rates: 14,383rdMost Valuable International Artwork: 14,540thTop
10%
Safest: 15,901stMost Subsidized Industry: 16,637thLargest Governments: 17,195thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 21,865thLargest Publishing Industry: 22,413thMost Scientifically Advanced: 24,048thMost Devout: 25,856thHighest Poor Incomes: 27,818th
Top
5%
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 114th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 119th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 125th in the regionMost Influential: 144th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 167th in the regionMost Stationary: 200th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 209th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 212th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 231st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 234th in the regionLargest Populations: 241st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 242nd in the regionMost Cultured: 243rd in the regionTop
10%
Longest Average Lifespans: 326th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 328th in the regionMost Pacifist: 333rd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 334th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 355th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 373rd in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 379th in the regionBest Weather: 393rd in the regionMost Developed: 399th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 405th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 409th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 442nd in the regionNicest Citizens: 499th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 540th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 561st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 586th in the regionMost Devout: 635th in the regionMost Inclusive: 636th in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 308 » PlanetPunk, Great Bights Mum, Corfad, Wineclaw, Siwale, Kwaj, Pallaith, Xentherida, Sil Dorsett, Cloydicia, Frances Francis the First of France, Phoronu, Unimaginable Doom, Shibutani, Yukti, Unsophisticate, Former English Colony, Koda-Land, Pleroma Sans Romans, New Trisone, Empy, Zeternia, Ethnon, Maott, Wilkshire, United States of Medford, The Iron Lions, The Rhein States, Soviet Terran, Malta Comino Gozo, Srpski Novo Zelandjani, Vexilia, Walter Jackson, Chukstik Illahi, Vincone Cae, Votak Matim, North Bratislava, The Windmilluminati, Dreadton, Omnistria, Ninjak30, Pasargad, Fengate, The Sinclarian Provinces, Necromonia, Antiyard, Panama Coalition, Ham Federation, Solmetria, Acrabinnia, and 258 others.Trillius, Loutsland, Seenvorland, PotatoFarmers, Prydania, Xagill, Kranostav, Zyvetskistaahn, Merconitonitopia, Nistriabar, Unshleepd, Sikol, Simone Republic, Nationeer, South Baba, Singamadri, Fran Advar, A Salmon Named Harold, Bankowiata, Ozstan, The Jerichowan Country, Laurendon, Dacian Freelands, Aeolist, Perikuresu, AmManies, Andanavia, Alcavia, Advancia-Sizzletown, Hellsinky, Capitista, Rainengrad, Atrito, New Terra-Nullius, Holy Marcus Empire, Menouria, Parpyduckland, KAP03land, Cobolica, Bornodia, Regallio, Oannia, The Arverni Lands, Rex Republic, Batatoland Empire, Eggplant Island, Bagojo, Inspiratus, Varisland, Filibustra, Arjuna, Omicron Persei V111, The Zheng Dynasty, Sechiole, The Austro Germanic Union, TyGerria, Old Emporia, TheLandOfFunFunFun, Austro-Bavarian States, Intion North, Radicaster, Wolffoxia, Chipoli, Russila, Transitional Global Authority, Darkanistan, Racoda, Elephant Bill Land, Aguaria Major, Technocratic-european Countries, Viceroy Vincent, Vlenkenov, Dem Republic of Romania, PlanetMercury, Kandorith, Laforeia, Pyos Ter, New Lakemba, Nouvel Empire, Jeltronian WA Mission, Harjad, IHateRights, Arucaria, Ellbonnia, Blyskalia, Esperonia, Gorundu, Iespao, Brackerca, Territorio di Nessuno, Zerentopia, Roman Empire August, Elliniki Dhmokratia, Snipland, Mesvice, Southern Moosetopia, Andstions, Federation of Vanguard, Neo Cheese Empire, Marlducro, Saugeen Shores, Catalis, Tvers, Love Shack, Etanur, Vilaforta, South Parter, Viridiann, Furballland, Deliber, The Soviet States of Europe, Northern-Kempia, Frieszia, New Atlantico, TamilPesum, The Secret Society of Zimbabwae2, New-Ferytland, Ishtimbine, Orjald, Valentine Z, Pinky Queen, Teriol, Rinadia, Dakota Territories, Yokciq Empire, DarkMondoria, Workers Republic of Prestes Order, Petronellania, Individualist Catopia, New Cordyceps, Alire, Bedsonya, Coth Pladyia, Ayuzhhhhh, Alogiada, Bjorkikistan, Coders, Libaga, Ovekisu, Neopie, Thought Obliteration, Great Ignesia, Crilland, Rezonovia, Notyoutopia, Oskland, Bodhisva, Castle In Confidence, Republiqueducroissant, Saint-Dauphin, Gojira, Sagevick, Tugupaw, The Scarborough Administration, Galbadiana, Inclement Space, Grith Neria, Valiacorkit, Maxiverse, Neptunian Military Administration, Brandon II, CyberEgypt, Jenha, Sindoesia, Izern, Qep, Amdupe, Ijo, Kingdom of Time, Sellaeta, Darbland, Texopolian TRADE ROUTE, Bardopia, Gragadoia, Mystiquelle, Leone Frankia, Aerilia, Everything Decided at Random, Zandos, Kabarovsk, Eurocom, New Bismuthium, Oceanica Empire, Latin Crimea, Hyphen, Jasmine Dragon, Western Justice, Armonker, Sapien-Zustand, Segesta, Lezaseia, Illusia and Neverendia, Ardok, United Orange Valley States, Bochlon, Norwegian FOREST Cat, Abskosmos, Wellate, Ereena, Choi Hanji, Photan, Verderiesdre, Zelenaya Dolina, Halsoni, Luminerra, Arostica, Psykistriaa, McMasterdonia, Eludmonden, Joevala, Barxa, Kainin, Lugarvatn, Myth Of Saints, Bormar, Fragrancia, Pribaltic Union, Germanic Cat, Ziprotscria, Crystal Creation, Texaska, Periklia, United Kahndaq, Alestadpolkhbizzydor, The Resoland, Altivia, Auvangad Eng, Small Venezia, Aoncarpa, ZleekyGgh, The New Oceanic States, The Three Moutains, Vancricia, Eralan, Francois Isidore, Ubeland, Avistonia, The Tony Paporordia, Suvarnavarta, Yaorozu, Balto, Aneth, AJTON, Tanbearia, Davidianian, Dillimore, Zyropia, Tsuen Kwai Tsing, Crownz Capital, Dotopolis, Khoik, Northern Zorbrasnka, Picairn, Tragesch Firwat, Bhadeshistan, Mortionia, Comfed, and Stal Valley.

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