The Cyan-Depleted Cartridges of Printer699 is a colossal, cultured nation, notable for its ritual sacrifices, infamous sell-swords, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 5.333 billion Printer699ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 80.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Printer699ian economy, worth 870 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 163,289 cards, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 498,817 per year while the poor average 41,431, a ratio of 12.0 to 1.

A survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, women earn less than half the salary of men if they can even find a job, it's said that a Printer699ian always pays his debts with significant compounding, and parties that are too noisy are broken up to prevent disturbing wildlife. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Printer699's national animal is the legendary, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Printer699 is ranked 22,656^th in the world and 1,684^th in Two for Lowest Crime Rates, with 87.64 law-abiding acts per hour.