Mr. Money Loses all Hope, Endorses The Salaxalans For Secretary General and Offers to Deliver Potatoes for Him

After much careful consideration on the matter of whom the most distinguished Mr. Money Esq. should endorse for Secretary General, the Money Household has reached the conclusion that it is best for everyone's sake to endorse Spiritus World Assembly Delegate and Starch fanatic, The Salaxalans, to bring free Potatoes to everyone on NationStates hopefully by the end of 2016. The Policies of all other candidates seldom suit the interests of Mr. Money and fail to prove productive to the whole of NationStates well beingin general. the choice set before the Nations of NationStates is between a Communist (need I say more?), a Raider, a Texan with Tacos and an egomaniac with lots of wives.

Left in such a dire situation, the only logical choice that NationStates has left to make is for the guy offering free Potatoes, and never before did I think I would have to say that! In conclusion, Mr. Money encourages WA Members to vote for The Salaxalans, endorses The Salaxalans for Secretary General and is offering to help deliver Potatoes for him in exchange for a nice Potato delivery commission, which I'm sure he can afford to offer.

What are you waiting for? Go out there and vote for The Salaxalans before we all bring back a new Lenin or Stalin!

Well unfortunately we got this lot to choose from. A Communist, the sort of character a sane individual would rather punch than vote for, a guy offering free Potatoes as his core Election message, an enormous Texan with Tacos and an intent to destroy the World Assembly, an African Warlord egomaniac and a dirty rotten Raider. Give me a break!

It’s not so much the Election itself that is a farce, as many people are saying, but the people we have to vote for. The fact that a Communist is winning in the polls, someone whos colour pallet is restricted to red, yellow and black, doesn’t inspire much confidence in everyday citizens. I for one can testify to that! First of all there were so many inspiring candidates in the early round, I personally had rooted for Modbusters, but as soon as the dregs and bottom feeders were wiped off the Electoral list, we ended up with rather a hopeless choice.

Communism makes the poor poorer and gives the nut in charge more power, an ideology fuelled by jealousy of those that are better than them and one that doesn’t help the average Joe one jot. A proud Capitalist like myself doesn’t want to see that sort of mindset running the show, we’ve been there and done that with Russia, most of Eastern Europe and Asia, and look where it got those citizens. I’m afraid our frontrunner and possible Secretary General will be turning NationStates into a Communist hellhole, raising a dead and rotting system out of the ideological ground to attack innocent folk and generally good people, Jason of the Argonauts style.

Raiders are not leadership material! They humiliate new and growing Regions or innocent successful ones to get a few kicks and a meaningless score on their pathetic tally board. The last time I saw a Raider in charge of something, they ended up leaving a stupid message on a World Factbook Entry and leaving a very bad smell behind them. Mr. Money will defend himself if Raiders win the Election.

I also don't want turn NationStates into a Dictatorship under an egomaniac like Idi Amin, where secret experiments are carried out on certain subjects and any opponents are called 'Obote men'. No thanks. Also, he can't even win a debate against a Potato fanatic, so I rest my case.

So as I sit back in my chair and consider the stark choice set before me and 174,000 people, I consign myself to the fan club of the guy with Potatoes and hope to you know who almighty that he is victorious, however unlikely that may be. With the unused Ballot Papers, as I'm sure there are many, I may be starting up my own Toilet Paper Company just to get rid of them as frankly, in this Election, that's what they are equal to, bog roll.

Before I finish this article, will the Salaxalans let me deliver his potatoes for him when he wins? If he's reading this I do indeed accept commissions. Mr. Money Spud Delivery Co. has quite a good ring to it, don't you think?

The Mathematics speaks for itself! If all non-Communists vote for The Salaxalans, then we will stop the Commie from being Secretary General, end of story! Slowly but surely, voters will throw away their Tacos, realise that Idi Amin cannot beat a Potato fanatic, let alone a Communist fanatic, and Raiders will stop voting for their no hope, 6% candidate and will grab the Potato with both hands and vote The Salaxalans, it's the only way! Please!