The Football Federation of DSAFF is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Oiktirmon-Nicao Paidarion with a fair hand, and renowned for its unlimited-speed roads, state-planned economy, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 5.417 billion Football Fans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, with Healthcare, Law & Order, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Clinepalas. The average income tax rate is 45.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but underdeveloped DSAFFian economy, worth 170 trillion Millions a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is 31,452 Millions, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

There's an aura of pseudoscience around academia, ambitious "businessmen" use their children to sell and advertise their products, clowns are being rounded up and admitted to mental institutions, and army doctors who come under attack defend themselves by using stethoscopes like nunchaku. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. DSAFF's national animal is the Rose, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Football.

DSAFF is ranked 34,894^th in the world and 95^th in Democratic Socialist Assembly for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 829.54 on the Clooney Contribution Index.