The Elective Monarchy of Swutzerland is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Iolani chocolate with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The compassionate, devout population of 3.813 billion Swutzerlandians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Gerwra. The average income tax rate is 78.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Swutzerlandian economy, worth 431 trillion Daddys franks a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 113,211 Daddys franks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The practice of capital punishment proves divisive, military pilots spend more time scraping feathers off their engines than flying their aircraft, sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed, and when the air force says "Black Hawk Down" they mean the feathers of the Swutzerlandian dark-plume goshawk. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Swutzerland's national animal is the chocolate monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Chocolateism.

Swutzerland is ranked 11,848^th in the world and 4^th in One big Island for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 54.76 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.