The Federal Kingdom of Skwar is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by King Thomas with a fair hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ubiquitous missile silos, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 10.422 billion Skwariots enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The minute, corrupt, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry is also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skwar Capital District. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Skwariot economy, worth a remarkable 2,512 trillion escudoes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 241,055 escudoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

The nation's democracy attracts huddled masses yearning to breathe free, pocket calculators are seen as status symbols for the ostentatiously wealthy, pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits, and woke teenagers spontaneously burst into tears when thinking about the world's woes. Crime, especially youth-related, is a major problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Skwar's national animal is the Skwar eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Skwaricism.

Skwar is ranked 46,701^st in the world and 797^th in the South Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 29.02 flags saluted per person per day.