The Kingdom of PlanetMercury is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Freddie Mercury with an even hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 9.076 billion PlanetMercuries are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kensington. The average income tax rate is 75.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient PlanetMercuryian economy, worth a remarkable 3,090 trillion pounds a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 340,462 pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

The Holy Office of the Inquisition is the highest court in the land, UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news, heavy industry grinds to a halt as new equipment must be biked in, and Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. PlanetMercury's national animal is the Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

PlanetMercury is ranked 283,353^rd in the world and 6,208^th in The North Pacific for Safest, scoring 4.35 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.