by Max Barry

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The Panda Republic Xiongmaitien of CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS

“上帝、熊猫、民主、团结、骄傲”

Category: Liberal Democratic Socialists
Civil Rights:
Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Hermit

Location: Panda Land

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS

Population10.381 billion

CapitalChengdu-Linzhu
LeaderPanda Xìng Yùn Xīng
FaithPanda Confucianism

CurrencyPanda Yuan
AnimalGiant Panda

The Panda Republic Xiongmaitien of CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Panda Xìng Yùn Xīng with a fair hand, and notable for its compulsory vegetarianism, daily referendums, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 10.381 billion Pandas love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Chengdu-Linzhu. The average income tax rate is 99.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Panda economy, worth a remarkable 2,129 trillion Panda Yuan a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 205,091 Panda Yuan, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government's giant servers are often used as a tourist trap, handling people's data is proving an immersive experience, Pandas suffer not the eggplant emoji to live, and Pandas refer to transgender people with insults instead of pronouns. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS's national animal is the Giant Panda, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Panda Confucianism.

CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS is ranked 4,083rd in the world and 1st in Panda Land for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 21,066.11 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Top
1%
Most Pacifist: 870thLowest Crime Rates: 1,135thMost Developed: 1,146thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,242ndMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,272ndHealthiest Citizens: 1,287thNicest Citizens: 1,467thBest Weather: 1,532ndMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,597thSafest: 1,678thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,792ndLargest Welfare Programs: 1,907thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1,951stMost Inclusive: 2,314thLargest Governments: 2,389thMost Income Equality: 2,536thHighest Food Quality: 2,622ndHighest Poor Incomes: 2,622ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,737thMost Beautiful Environments: 2,812thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 2,871stTop
5%
Most Advanced Public Education: 2,930thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,274thSmartest Citizens: 3,793rdMost Efficient Economies: 3,806thLargest Publishing Industry: 4,083rdMost Cultured: 5,108thMost Subsidized Industry: 5,559thMost Cheerful Citizens: 5,711thMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,009thLargest Information Technology Sector: 6,530thMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,792ndHighest Average Incomes: 9,672ndMost Secular: 9,878thHighest Economic Output: 11,608thTop
10%
Most Corrupt Governments: 19,587thMost Patriotic: 26,141st

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Beautiful Environments, Most Inclusive, Most Advanced Public Education, Highest Foreign Aid Spending, and Most Developed.
  • : CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Poor Incomes.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, Pandas refer to transgender people with insults instead of pronouns.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, Pandas suffer not the eggplant emoji to live.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, handling people's data is proving an immersive experience.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, the government's giant servers are often used as a tourist trap.
  • : CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, camera crews have accompanied conscripted dancers to film 'Marching On Ice'.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, religious leaders order congregants to love any neighbour who is just like themselves.
  • : Following new legislation in CUTE PANDASSSSSSSSSSSS, Panda Xìng Yùn Xīng can often be seen hanging around playgrounds chatting with the kids.

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