The Republic of Kiiwiiiii is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Bishop Incense with a fair hand, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, compulsory military service, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 34.192 billion Kiiwiiiiians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Holy Waterville. The average income tax rate is 50.6%.

The strong Kiiwiiiiian economy, worth a remarkable 1,285 trillion kiis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Arms Manufacturing, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 37,587 kiis, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

The army's use of chemical weapons leaves a bad taste in the mouth, farting etiquette is taught in schools, the government mails weekly updates on the new anti-junk mail laws to every citizen, and a large concrete wall is being built around the country's borders. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kiiwiiiii's national animal is the wii, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Kiiwiiiii is ranked 162,237^th in the world and 1^st in 666 for Lowest Crime Rates, with 59.95 law-abiding acts per hour.