The Irish Republic of Main is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by The Main Man with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, unlimited-speed roads, and stringent health and safety legislation. The cheerful, devout population of 24.702 billion Mainiacs are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mainland. The average income tax rate is 68.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Mainiacal economy, worth a remarkable 2,256 trillion Dollars a year, is extremely specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 91,348 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Owning a really cute pet is grounds for immediate investigation, businesses are abandoning the city centre because of the lack of transport connections, textbooks are exactly twice as heavy as they used to be, and cars speed down national highways while drivers sleep at the wheel. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Main's national animal is the Monster, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Main is ranked 34,436^th in the world and 3^rd in Eireann for Lowest Crime Rates, with 80.25 law-abiding acts per hour.