by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Borderlands of Taurgur

“Minnai gwannava...”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Sprat

Location: Forest

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Taurgur

Population15.347 billion

Capitalthe Heart of Taurgur
Leaderthe Presence of Taurgur
FaithSuicide by Dissapearance

Currencydeath
Animallost soul

The Borderlands of Taurgur is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by the Presence of Taurgur with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, absence of drug laws, and exploding hoverboards. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.347 billion the Losts are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Spirituality and Law & Order are also considered important, while Welfare and Healthcare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the Heart of Taurgur. The average income tax rate is 7.8%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Taurgurian economy, worth a remarkable 1,785 trillion deaths a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 116,331 deaths, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Tuba players are paid to quietly whisper into their instruments, napalm is the tool of choice for disabling eco-unfriendly forestry operations, exports of chewing gum are inexplicably falling, and town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Taurgur's national animal is the lost soul, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Suicide by Dissapearance.

Taurgur is ranked 292,205th in the world and 338th in Forest for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring -43.93 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 48thMost Ignorant Citizens: 67thMost Devout: 162ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 255thHighest Drug Use: 284thFattest Citizens: 374thMost Avoided: 505thMost Armed: 561stHighest Crime Rates: 603rdMost Corrupt Governments: 852ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,283rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,783rdBest Weather: 2,593rdMost Beautiful Environments: 2,669thTop
5%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 4,255thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 5,551stHighest Disposable Incomes: 5,866thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6,868thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 8,532ndLargest Black Market: 9,250thMost Patriotic: 12,142ndTop
10%
Highest Economic Output: 14,692ndMost Stationary: 21,124thMost Influential: 22,110thLargest Populations: 25,962ndMost Authoritarian: 27,678th
Top
1%
Most Primitive: 3rd in the regionTop
5%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 5th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 5th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 6th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionMost Devout: 6th in the regionMost Avoided: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 7th in the regionMost Armed: 8th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 8th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 15th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 16th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 19th in the regionMost Patriotic: 21st in the regionMost Authoritarian: 21st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 24th in the regionLargest Black Market: 26th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 29th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, exports of chewing gum are inexplicably falling.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, napalm is the tool of choice for disabling eco-unfriendly forestry operations.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, tuba players are paid to quietly whisper into their instruments.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, bruised children are made to thank their bullies for the valuable life lessons.
  • : Taurgur was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Primitive, Most Avoided, Most Beautiful Environments, and Highest Crime Rates and the Top 5% for Most Patriotic.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, government statistics suggest 115% of the population love the Presence of Taurgur.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, people spend a lot on hair and nails.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, debates on whether toilet seats should be left up or down are increasingly commonplace.
  • : Following new legislation in Taurgur, explosive diarrhoea is not just a colorful phrase.

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