The Disputed Territories of Goldnation is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Bob Loblaw with an even hand, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, smutty television, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cheerful population of 3.54 billion Goldies have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Belleville. The average income tax rate is 94.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Goldnationian economy, worth 459 trillion bullions a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 129,781 bullions, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Immersive video game experiences are interrupted by incessant disclaimer pop-ups, the bonfire of the old paper records can be seen for miles around Belleville, the government is hoping that medical aid will speak louder than human rights abuses, and there is an abondance of ackawi and zartschmelzend in every Goldnationian grocery store. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Goldnation's national animal is the mongoose, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Goldnation is ranked 58,660^th in the world and 1,012^th in the South Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 23.98 flags saluted per person per day.