The Imperial Commonwealth of Saint Marinas is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Murzkull Dur-Djurfúng Hamoff IV with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, keen interest in outer space, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 3.952 billion Saint Marinasai are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mónte Marina. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 79.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Saint Marinisian economy, worth 674 trillion knoins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 170,774 knoins, with the richest citizens earning 8.6 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens applying for their first jobs face fierce competition from the homeless, space has been brought down to earth with constellations of cancer cases across Saint Marinas, Emperor Murzkull Dur-Djurfúng Hamoff IV is worshipped as a god, and breast milk is being redistributed from each according to their ability to each according to their need. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Saint Marinas's national animal is the mallard duck, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is The Church of the Emperor.

Saint Marinas is ranked 215,528^th in the world and 1,288^th in Europe for Safest, scoring 33.34 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.