by Max Barry

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The Unpleasant Drainpipe of Gurou

“It's all over”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Few
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Page

Location: The North Pacific

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Gurou

Population12.936 billion

CapitalWiyNei
LeaderBronzefishy
FaithWorship of Omnipotent Danger Noodle

CurrencyIousy
AnimalDeadly Garden Snake

The Unpleasant Drainpipe of Gurou is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Bronzefishy with an iron fist, and remarkable for its enslaved workforce, compulsory vegetarianism, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 12.936 billion Gurouans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of WiyNei. The average income tax rate is 95.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Gurouan economy, worth a remarkable 3,104 trillion Iousies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 239,972 Iousies, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Libraries are refusing to stock A Midsummer Night's Dream because it has an ass in it, withdrawal of support for drug addicts is leaving many with cold sweats, children playing with walkie-talkies are told to 'get a job', and doughnut-makers claim their products are healthy because they are fortified with vitamins. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gurou's national animal is the Deadly Garden Snake, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Worship of Omnipotent Danger Noodle.

Gurou is ranked 19,626th in the world and 798th in The North Pacific for Most Scientifically Advanced, scoring 282.81 on the Kurzweil Singularity Index.

Top
1%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 359thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 428thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 530thMost Influential: 965thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,120thLargest Black Market: 1,555thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,904thTop
5%
Most Secular: 3,325thHighest Poor Incomes: 3,734thMost Patriotic: 4,078thMost Corrupt Governments: 4,431stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 4,847thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,657thMost Advanced Public Education: 5,910thHighest Average Incomes: 6,133rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6,197thLargest Governments: 6,446thLowest Crime Rates: 6,534thHighest Economic Output: 7,007thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 9,131stLargest Information Technology Sector: 9,892ndMost Developed: 10,199thMost Stationary: 11,433rdLongest Average Lifespans: 11,897thMost Beautiful Environments: 13,231stTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 15,303rdSmartest Citizens: 18,960thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,626thLargest Mining Sector: 19,657thMost Subsidized Industry: 25,118th
Top
1%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 19th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 23rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 34th in the regionLargest Black Market: 45th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 48th in the regionTop
5%
Most Corrupt Governments: 116th in the regionMost Secular: 133rd in the regionMost Patriotic: 134th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 155th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 204th in the regionMost Influential: 207th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 214th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 222nd in the regionMost Stationary: 233rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 238th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 238th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 243rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 254th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 280th in the regionLargest Governments: 296th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 303rd in the regionTop
10%
Largest Mining Sector: 341st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 433rd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 455th in the regionMost Developed: 515th in the regionLargest Populations: 537th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 591st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 610th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 629th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 266 » Corfad, Siwale, Shibutani, PlanetPunk, Koda-Land, Empy, Wineclaw, Pallaith, Zeternia, Kwaj, Frances Francis the First of France, Former English Colony, Ethnon, Malta Comino Gozo, Sil Dorsett, Maott, Xentherida, New Trisone, Wilkshire, The Iron Lions, The Rhein States, Great Bights Mum, Vexilia, Chukstik Illahi, AGoodPlace, Elevation, Vincone Cae, Votak Matim, North Bratislava, Walter Jackson, Cloydicia, Omnistria, Dreadton, Pavlikstan, Unsophisticate, Soviet Terran, Ninjak30, The Windmilluminati, Yukti, Pasargad, The Sinclarian Provinces, Solmetria, Panama Coalition, Trillius, Acrabinnia, Unimaginable Doom, Loutsland, Seenvorland, Felpolandia, PotatoFarmers, and 216 others.Kranostav, Zyvetskistaahn, Necromonia, Lemonbiscuits, Nationeer, Merconitonitopia, Xagill, Antiyard, Nistriabar, Unshleepd, Sikol, Prydania, Simone Republic, Bankowiata, Ozstan, The Jerichowan Country, AmManies, Andanavia, Advancia-Sizzletown, Hellsinky, Holy Marcus Empire, Aeolist, Parpyduckland, KAP03land, Bornodia, Regallio, The Arverni Lands, Tehmistan, GPT-3, Dacian Freelands, Bagojo, Inspiratus, Oannia, Fengate, A Salmon Named Harold, 2 and 2 is Fish, Eraver, Thought Obliteration, Dicko, The Bikini Bottom Republic, Laxoimia, Fratanica, Aeurithianar, Free State Of Wrangler Island, Varisland, Hai Han, The Peoples Republic of Kyle, Azzarel, Perikuresu, Phoronu, Esteneng, The Austro Germanic Union, Karazan, Very Pog, Gragadoia, Filibustra, Arucaria, Old Emporia, Intelbrazia, Coutdown, Scres Gidgerland, Rainengrad, Katuda, Laurendon, Toli, Batatoland Empire, Loptous, Keb Numar, Pleroma Sans Romans, Atrito, The Unicrons, Omicron Persei V111, Khoik, Singamadri, Amdupe, Sechiole, TyGerria, TheLandOfFunFunFun, Intion North, Radicaster, Wolffoxia, Chipoli, New-Ferytland, Russila, Transitional Global Authority, Darkanistan, Racoda, Aguaria Major, Technocratic-european Countries, Austro-Bavarian States, Harjad, Vlenkenov, Dem Republic of Romania, Laforeia, PlanetMercury, Kandorith, Pyos Ter, New Lakemba, Nouvel Empire, Jeltronian WA Mission, Ellbonnia, IHateRights, Gorundu, Esperonia, Territorio di Nessuno, Zerentopia, Snipland, Southern Moosetopia, Aurasreich, Andstions, Rex Republic, Marlducro, Catalis, Love Shack, Etanur, South Parter, Deliber, Northern-Kempia, New Atlantico, TamilPesum, The Secret Society of Zimbabwae2, Bjorkikistan, Ishtimbine, Frieszia, Pinky Queen, Dakota Territories, Kingdom of Time, Roman Empire August, Rinadia, Valentine Z, Alire, Petronellania, Workers Republic of Prestes Order, Bedsonya, Ayuzhhhhh, Tanushland, Alogiada, Calahy, Ovekisu, Great Ignesia, Blyskalia, Bodhisva, Notyoutopia, Castle In Confidence, Federation of Vanguard, Tugupaw, Inclement Space, Grith Neria, DarkMondoria, CyberEgypt, Jenha, Izern, Democratic Republic of Magley, Kaiser Dominance, Sindoesia, Crilland, Republiqueducroissant, Bardopia, Mortionia, Leone Frankia, Neutral Federation of the Mountains, Aerilia, Zandos, Eurocom, Hyphen, Neptunian Military Administration, Mystiquelle, Western Justice, Latin Crimea, Armonker, United Orange Valley States, Segesta, Illusia and Neverendia, Norwegian FOREST Cat, Ereena, Furballland, Verderiesdre, Kyroth Dreemurr, McMasterdonia, Luminerra, Arostica, Kainin, Valiacorkit, Eludmonden, Fragrancia, CzechoSaxony, Pribaltic Union, Barxa, Halsoni, Germanic Cat, Texaska, United Kahndaq, Altivia, Aoncarpa, The New Oceanic States, Ardok, Crownz Capital, Vancricia, Francois Isidore, Opis, Eralan, Ubeland, The Resoland, Suvarnavarta, Yaorozu, Dillimore, Davidianian, Tragesch Firwat, AnnaK, Northern Zorbrasnka, Yokciq Empire, Bhadeshistan, Stal Valley, Hikki, Vendonesam, and Gorutimania.

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