The Big Tex Happy Taco Stands of NewTexas is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Big Tex with a fair hand, and renowned for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, complete lack of public education, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 46.34 billion NewTexans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of NewAustin. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient NewTexan economy, worth an astonishing 18,629 trillion Fajita Tacoes a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Book Publishing, and Soda Sales. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 402,018 Fajita Tacoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Commuters are denied boarding for attempting to bring packed lunches onto trains, faking deafness is the only way to guarantee a holiday in the nation, officials pull all-nighters to check immigrants for potential links to terrorists, and the government response to disaster victims starving for bread is "let them eat stale cake". Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. NewTexas's national animal is the Armadillo, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

NewTexas is ranked 295,515^th in the world and 94^th in Texas for Nicest Citizens, with 0.1 average smiles per day.