The East PacificBoard

This list compiles aspects of TEP I’ve seen for certain nations. These aspects have been GREATLY EXAGGERATED FOR COMEDIC EFFECT! Some nations I’ve left out due to risk of misinterpretations or anything I write here being perceived as an insult. If you are on the list and if one of my things truly offends you to the point where you need to hang me for crimes against you and your family....

Just deal with it.

La Xinga
1. Smashes that like button in the face
2. Can’t grammatically interpret “Rage Mage”.
3. Has seriously slacked off on number 1.

Kampf Empire
1. Iron
2. Iron
3. Bath Water
4. Iron
5. Sith Inquistor
6. Iron
7. Shouts a lot
8. Screw it. Civil War!
9. A brick with Writers written on it hits you in the face
10. Rule 1. for avoiding Kampfs wrath, wait a week and he’ll totally forget about potentially attacking you.
11. Apparently is Clairvoyant. (R.I.P Prince Philip)

Great algerstonia
1. Changes flags like a teen girl trying to find the right dress.
2. Has two modes: Silly-Serious and Death

Pakitsk
1. Is obsessed with spinny chairs
2. Is Texan....I’m sure you get the rest
3. His mortal enemy is some dude named Leaderjoseph stalin.
4. Keep an eye on the bushes and trees, he really wants to use his hammer.
5. Also cannot read maps.

Zukchiva
1. Ummmmmm.....
2. Former map man.
3. DO NOT BELIEVE THE NAYSAYER! THE MAPMAN WILL ALWAYS BE MAPMAN!!
4. Untitled Zuk Game

Kilkire
1. Irish...nuff said
2. Or was it Dutch?

The angel of charity
1. Is scarier than Kampf
2. Floof
3. Has the ability to erase one from existence
4. Their ability to not finish RPs is only rivaled by EK

Osterreich und ungarn
1. Has a lot of land? I guess.
2. Likes meetings
3. Created Honorism

Shavara
1.

talks like this

2. It’s time for bed.
3. That one dude that for some reason, you know bad things will happen if you piss them off.

Slagenseter forn
1. gots dem big gunz
2. Don’t ask him to repair stuff, I tried to have my mini cooper repaired and he gave me back an attack helicopter.

Rage mage
1. Has the marvelous ability to piss people off by accident
2. Is concerned at how much they monitor banned nations.

The death syndicate
1. Has Slaves

The cult of the great cthulhu
1. Giant squid
2.Many targ...I mean eyes
3. Smells like fish.

Wersh
1. Has a big island
2. Tells crazy stories

Peatiktist
1. Flag reading failed
2. Creator of the PCU. Peatikist Character Universe

Marrabuk
1. Horses
2. MOAR ENDORSEMENTS YOU LAZY PLEBS!
3. He kinda just dropped off the face of the RMB after his term ended.

Wiranath
1. Makes a puppet for every time someone misspells his name.
2. Has a serious issue with putting so much time into Dispatch Hunting.

The waaa
1. Mentally Unstable
2. Will most likely nuke the world due to the nuke button not being purple, resulting in him punching it.

Dreamersistan
1. Spider Lennies
2. Mysteriously vanished, the RMB has entered the dark times....
3. Out lord and savior has returned!
4. Aaaannnd he’s gone again.

Restoration of Eastern Kaiserreich
1. Florida Gator Ks.
2. Can’t read a map to save his nation
3. Has once started a war due to Fact 2.
4. Has a perfectly normal bible that no one should worry about.
5. Can’t finish RPs to save his life.
6. Makes crummy puns with words that have EK in them.

BearStackof2015
1. Refrigerator?
2. Likes stacking bears

New union of sovereign soviet republics
1. To war! But not with these people...
2. Screw it. Let’s go capitalist! Hail Kurikia!

Grossvietnam
1. Lives in space
2. Look! You have a second bullet point!

Talitoa
1. Really wants on this list.
2. War criminal

The Holy Utopian Republic
1. Is...um....yeah I got nothing
2. Wants to go on a Liberation Crusade

Levantin
1. Well sh*t.
2. I think he caused some trouble recently.
3. Kill on sight. Infected with the EK pun virus.
4. LEV-CHAN!!
5. Got into NWE’s liquor cabinet.

Brethren
1. Dragons
2. Whoever told you that I shattered the mind of a six year old reptile from their nation mind is a dirtbag and a liar.
3. Note to self: Apple is a boy. Not a girl.
4. Go Go Dolphin Rangers! You Mighty Mammal Dolphin Rangers!

Golbad
1. TRADE DEALS ANYONE!?
2. Believes Phoenixes are part of the Ragean workforce and are up for contract.
3. Well this guy went poof.

Volinovia
1. You want some corn? Got lots of corn here...
2. Hey Kampf, check out my cross.
3. Soccer Mom of TEP

Euricanis
1. I actually have nothing for this one that’s relevant.
2. Da fuq do you want?
3. Oh I’m SOOOO sorry! Did you NEEEED something?

Plazland
1. Anime Waifus

Nova-Columbia
1. Old-new map man
2. Screw it. Name change! Hail Krionik
3. Name change again! Hail Rouental!

ArenaC
1. CLOUDS!!
2. WIND!!
3. RAIN!!!
4. LIGHTNI-AAAAAAHHHHH!
5. snow
6. Rumors have spread that Dr. AC has walked into three fences and two electric fences because he missed the door due to staring at the sky or his phone radar. These rumors are unconfirmed.

Kaliento
1. Gots me some OIL!
2. NEEDS ME SOME MOAR FISH!
3. Screw it. Name Change! Hail Meddacah
4. Gotcha Slat.

Rangan
1. Worst person in existence
OOC: This nation is my puppet!

Danelaw Scandinavia
1. Scandinavian...I guess.
2. Pianos? I have no idea where that came from. But Distro thought that it was key to Danes smash intro card
4. JoEKer
5. EK infected. KOS.

Aslaconrad
1. Thought he could avoid my list

Haviluthen
1. Religious...persons... I think.

Ruseniya
1.Wanted to be on list
2. Thinks 1. is cringy.

The remnant of the enclave
1. AMERICA IS PURE!
2. HAIL THE PRESIDENT!

Virgolia
1. He's... there....I guess.
2. Is the Talitoan war crimes archivist.

Imperfeudal
1. You are here now

Warris : I want the real main account.
Lerasi : I said the real main account.
Aivintis: Perfection.

The Militarius Imperium
1. Needs bread
2. Capitalism

Merlovich
1. Gonna need to think of good one here...
2. TEP Endgame

Encurage
1. Wait this guy isn’t even here anymore.

The Solar Ottomans
1. Weed Cards

Kylondia
1. Heard he’s a wonderful guy!
2. Just wants to watch the world burn.

Technocratic tagalog
1. Poison...I think. Or is that Centralist?

Distro-Spartica
1. Super Smash NS Bros Ultimate! Waluigi is STILL not in the game!

Slatos
1. Public Enemy 1-48

Phost cel
1. This guy is really shifty
2. Expert Slatos Hunter

Kavanos
1. There you are on the list. Happy?

Karatol-Advenra
1. Apparently their name is singular as well as two individuals.
2. Gets fought over...A LOT.
3. pog

Regatunii
1. Tuna Boi? I’d like to seem him try and beat Brethren’s Mighty Mammal Dolphin Rangers.
2. Acts kinda sus.

Saint Cinder
1. Not entirely sure what this guy’s deal is. All I know is that he lurks in our RMB then flees south.

The new wisconsin empire
1. Every hour is happy hour!

Of Centralist Brexit
1. Joke stealer.
2. Name triggers the grammar perfectionist in me.
3. Color

Serkin
1. Also acts kinda sus.

Kianhua
1. Only pops up as an excuse for people to fight over it seems.

The directorate
1. Aivintis make a nation for this dammit.

Kryznogorsk
1. Will be watched...

Terrabis-Seran
1. Cannot start an RP without their three headed hydra who sets the scene.

Yukkira
1. Is a three headed hydra.

Valsoran Cartographers
1. Must have multiple personality disorder, keeps changing their behavior.
2. Last year they just sat around and now they’re as active as the energizer bunny.

Sicilianzo
1. Just became Atlantis…with dragons.
2. Wait they’re not anymore? Well sh!t.
3. Must be the ping pong nation Valsoran Cartographers was referring to.

Order of the Saint Dumas
1. Name comes from that edgy batman from way back …Azul? Azueral? Bah. He’s been most likely written out of existence by now, or maybe he’s still around?
2. Please! Capitalize that “s”! I beg of you!
3. Balance has been restored!