| Category: Father Knows Best State | ||
| Civil Rights: Some |
Economy: Frightening |
Political Freedoms: Few |
Regional Influence: Page
Location: BFB Teams

| Population | 4.278 billion |
| Capital | Upper Surrey St Stall Featured Corp |
| Leader | Biscuit Famous Greg Heffley |
| Currency | Biscuit Dollar |
| Animal | Dog |
The Featured Wimpy Kid 11 Stall of Bite My Biscuits is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Biscuit Famous Greg Heffley with an iron fist, and notable for its national health service, compulsory military service, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.278 billion Greg Citizens are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Upper Surrey St Stall Featured Corp. The average income tax rate is 70.5%.
The frighteningly efficient Biscuitian economy, worth a remarkable 1,083 trillion Biscuit Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 253,241 Biscuit Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.
Vegetarianism is compulsory, public transit is widely considered to be perpetrating the patriarchy, the Finance Ministry has gone into meltdown upon hearing the price to avoid nuclear disaster, and proletariat workers identify less with the hammer and sickle and more with the touchscreen and phone charger. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bite My Biscuits's national animal is the Dog, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.
Bite My Biscuits is ranked 58,145th in the world and 1st in BFB Teams for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 4,266.11 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- :
Bite My Biscuits's influence in BFB Teams rose from "Shoeshiner" to "Page".
- :
Bite My Biscuits's influence in BFB Teams rose from "Zero" to "Shoeshiner".
- :
Bite My Biscuits lodged a message on the BFB Teams Regional Message Board.
- :
Bite My Biscuits relocated from Cataclyst Order to BFB Teams.
- : Following new legislation in
Bite My Biscuits, proletariat workers identify less with the hammer and sickle and more with the touchscreen and phone charger.
- : Following new legislation in
Bite My Biscuits, the Finance Ministry has gone into meltdown upon hearing the price to avoid nuclear disaster.
- : Following new legislation in
Bite My Biscuits, public transit is widely considered to be perpetrating the patriarchy.
- : Following new legislation in
Bite My Biscuits, vegetarianism is compulsory.
- : Following new legislation in
Bite My Biscuits, government bureaucrats devote many man-hours to trying to measure unquantifiables.
- :
Bite My Biscuits's influence in Cataclyst Order rose from "Page" to "Squire".


































































