The Awkward Adages of Geektopia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Nijchhōh I with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, national health service, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 11.73 billion Kwandoites are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordecai. The average income tax rate is 96.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Geektopian economy, worth a remarkable 4,370 trillion cryptos a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 372,558 cryptos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

There's nothing more rock-and-roll than absolute sobriety, one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man, believers who wear their faith on their sleeves make easy targets in hostile areas, and the mood of raunchy movies is often ruined by the sound of babies crying. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Geektopia's national animal is the ass, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Math.

Geektopia is ranked 288,390^th in the world and 1,293^rd in Europeia for Highest Food Quality, scoring 3.91 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.