The Republic of Kispaming is a mammoth, socially progressive nation, ruled by Sapagan with a fair hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.895 billion Kispamingians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Spagmik. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Kispamingian economy, worth a remarkable 2,679 trillion pesos a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 301,229 pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The national anthem is a rather effective sleeping aid, young children are learning advanced physics to scientifically disprove the existence of Santa Claus, mandatory state-funded classes teach Libertarianism, and members of the government all have oddly similar anecdotes about their childhoods. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kispaming's national animal is the hamster, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is None.

Kispaming is ranked 1,238^th in the world and 26^th in the Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 334 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.