The Democratic Republic of Minnesota is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 26.972 billion Minnesotans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The medium-sized, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, International Aid, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 20.5%.

The thriving Minnesotan economy, worth a remarkable 1,417 trillion lakes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 52,546 lakes, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 185,997 per year while the poor average 10,718, a ratio of 17.4 to 1.

Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Minnesota's national animal is the carp, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Minnesota is ranked 29,121^st in the world and 4^th in United States for Most Primitive, scoring 71.41 on the Scary Big Number Scale.