The Incorporated States of NSC Puppet 97 is a colossal, efficient nation, renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, strictly enforced bedtime, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 6.15 billion NSC Puppet 97ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 80.2%.

The frighteningly efficient NSC Puppet 97ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,094 trillion cards a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 177,906 cards, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

The disabled are forced to undergo an MRI scan every time they pick up their benefit payments, economists have been named Invertebrates of the Year, the Super-Spud Cinematic Universe is breaking box office records, and research into 'designer babies' is banned. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. NSC Puppet 97's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

NSC Puppet 97 is ranked 204,335^th in the world and 582^nd in Two for Most Primitive, scoring -84.57 on the Scary Big Number Scale.