The United States of Qeskaria is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Waclaw Kaplan with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, frequent executions, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 12.074 billion Qeskarians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Klodzko. The average income tax rate is 74.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Qeskarian economy, worth a remarkable 1,274 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 105,538 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The fate of the world literally rests on Waclaw Kaplan's fingers, criminals are really screwed, internet moderators work overtime to remove memes comparing Waclaw Kaplan to cartoon bears, and search and rescue forces now accept cheques and all major credit cards. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Qeskaria's national animal is the Sheep, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Qeskaria is ranked 111,686^th in the world and 26^th in Northern Utopia for Safest, scoring 78.28 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.