The Totally Not A Mafia State of The Bailiff is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, renowned for its pith helmet sales, fear of technology, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 16.306 billion Jerseyites have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Defense, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Van Zandt. The average income tax rate is 19.0%.

The very strong Jerseyan economy, worth a remarkable 1,320 trillion Jersey Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Pizza Delivery, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 80,997 Jersey Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.8 times as much as the poorest.

Leader's new office has a propensity to catch on fire, tourists call Jerseyan beach towns "the fine coastline", children get arrested for floating paper boats on lakes, and an increasing number of citizens believe the world is flat. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent. The Bailiff's national animal is the Crab.

The Bailiff is ranked 75,775^th in the world and 1^st in Bailiwick of New Jersey for Most Corrupt Governments, with 22.58 kickbacks per hour.