The Incorporated States of Thisguyaresick is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Smitty with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism, sprawling nuclear power plants, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 4.234 billion Thisguyaresickians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Thisguyaresickian City. The average income tax rate is 9.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Thisguyaresickian economy, worth 241 trillion Beskars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Tourism. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 56,943 Beskars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Drug-related crimes carry the death penalty, meetings are often scheduled for "about four-ish" following complete conversion to sundials, sleeping on the job is recommended, and Thisguyaresickians also serve as great lightning rods. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low. Thisguyaresick's national animal is the Arctic Tern, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is NA.

Thisguyaresick is ranked 158,301^st in the world and 6,266^th in Lazarus for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 538.96 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.