The United States of Wars Forever is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by CATS with an iron fist, and notable for its zero percent divorce rate, strictly enforced bedtime, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 33.261 billion Wars Foreverians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Law & Order are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Underground Ketchup. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Wars Foreverian economy, worth an astonishing 19,232 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Average income is a breathtaking 578,228 dollars, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,204,728 per year while the poor average 24,931, a ratio of 168 to 1.

All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras, children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-dollar charge on their phone bill, the practice of capital punishment proves divisive, and public incontinence is a growing problem amongst the nation's women. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Wars Forever's national animal is the Giant enemy crab, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Wars Forever is ranked 333,554^th in the world and 54^th in Wysteria for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 0.75 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.