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Providence: The new novel by Max Barry, creator of NationStates

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«12. . .20,19620,19720,19820,19920,20020,20120,202. . .64,20164,202»

Auctoritatisque wrote:Hello

Hello ^_^
How are you?

Curlyhoward gives you wiiiiiings!

I luvvva you ALL so harrrrrrrrd!!

And, as always, don't forget to washa where the Sun don't shiiiiiiiiine!

Quiescent, Si-topia, Aumeltopia, Volaworand, and 3 othersLily pad nation, The Filippinas, and William wordsworth

Curlyhoward wrote:Curlyhoward gives you wiiiiiings!

I luvvva you ALL so harrrrrrrrd!!

And, as always, don't forget to washa where the Sun don't shiiiiiiiiine!

Curly said hard...

Curlyhoward, Quiescent, and Volaworand

William wordsworth

Most sweet it is with unuplifted eyes
To pace the ground, if path be there or none,
While a fair region round the traveller lies
Which he forbears again to look upon;
Pleased rather with some soft ideal scene,
The work of Fancy, or some happy tone
Of meditation, slipping in between
The beauty coming and the beauty gone.
If Thought and Love desert us, from that day
Let us break off all commerce with the Muse:
With Thought and Love companions of our way,
Whate'er the senses take or may refuse,
The Mind's internal heaven shall shed her dews
Of inspiration on the humblest lay.

Lily pad nation

Drystar wrote:This almost makes me want to run for LC... but that would require work

Who said anything about the LC needing to work? It’s obviously broken, one more lazy cog isn’t going to rot the foundation any more than it already is.

With that said— #DrystarForAllLCPositions

Quiescent, Sanjurika, Volaworand, Agalaesia, and 1 otherWilliam wordsworth

William wordsworth

Erinor, does this land have a poet laureate?

Quiescent, Aumeltopia, and Lily pad nation

Lily pad nation wrote:Who said anything about the LC needing to work? It’s obviously broken, one more lazy cog isn’t going to rot the foundation any more than it already is.

With that said— #DrystarForAllLCPositions

#LilyPadNationForNoLCPositions
<3

Lily pad nation

Roavin wrote:Home now, so I have a few minutes of computer time.

The LegComm stuff is pretty much out in the open at this point and everybody (except Islands) is on the same page wrt how it went down.

To be fair to Somy, it was pretty much Islands' doing - all Somy did was ask the question (which is fair, see below). Islands was messaging a bunch of people with a screenshot from that group (specifically https://i.imgur.com/SOCMFC8.png ) and encouraging people to vote RON.

It's pretty much a thing again ever since Islands showed up, who came into the region with a big populist anti-establishment message, reaching out to newer nations, and getting ridiculously close in his first election because of it. That I and a few other people thought this was suspicious and reeked of a plant trying to subvert things shouldn't be a surprise.

And the record shows that I really don't mind responding to public criticism. It's when it's in the backrooms and I can't respond to it that it bugs me.

Yup, that matches my presumption from earlier:
So - yes, mea culpa, I should have said something there at the time.

I wouldn't say it's like that by default, but I've done that several times so it's fair criticism. That makes two of us at least :P

I did everything in the open and I didn't lie about anything. >_>

But yeah, I liked how the election was going up until today. It was close, nobody knew how things were going to go, it was 98% positive campaigning on both sides by two candidates with immense respect for each other, and now ... this.

No, you have not lied. I would like to thank you for your clarifications

Quiescent and Roavin

William wordsworth wrote:Erinor, does this land have a poet laureate?

Someone's angling for the position, I see :P

A poet laureate would be a fun idea, IMO.

The Solar System Scope, Quiescent, Roavin, Erinor, and 4 othersVolaworand, Lily pad nation, Agalaesia, and William wordsworth

Horizon metrocorp

Does this region have a good financial prospects?

Horizon metrocorp wrote:Does this region have a good financial prospects?

No. Unfortunately, our Legal budget takes up a whole lot of space. Our chief justice Kringalia has to be paid somehow.

Quiescent, Roavin, Aumeltopia, and Lily pad nation

William wordsworth

Aumeltopia wrote:Someone's angling for the position, I see :P

A poet laureate would be a fun idea, IMO.

It would. And of course, as the most experienced member, I would do humble service paying homage to the UK The South Pacific.

Would be an excellent role or role to aspire to, to boost community engagement.

The Solar System Scope, Quiescent, Aumeltopia, Lily pad nation, and 1 otherAgalaesia

Horizon metrocorp wrote:Does this region have a good financial prospects?

Not at all. What isn't eaten up by the officers, I steal.

The Solar System Scope, Volaworand, and Lily pad nation

Horizon metrocorp

Agalaesia wrote:No. Unfortunately, our Legal budget takes up a whole lot of space. Our chief justice Kringalia has to be paid somehow.

I represent a Corporation you see, if theirs no market I'll advise our board to move to another region if their is no market or interests here in TSP

Si-topia wrote:Hello TSP! I had a fun, relaxing weekend at my grandparents farm. We made ice cream, went fishing, I tried astrophotography for the first time, played with the cows, and roasted marshmallows over the bonfire. I'm definitely glad to be back home in my own bed though :p

Hi, sweetie! *hugs*

Quiescent and Si-topia

M a d a m e x wrote:hiii x

JOY!!!!

M a d a m e x

William wordsworth

Europe is a strange place. I much prefer my home of the UK: the rolling hills, the dreary weather, the poet laureate position.... They are interesting though.

Right. I have indeed looked at both candidates, and I'm pleased to announce that I'll be voting Aumeltopia, because I believe he can provide a link, and be the 'head' of our glorious region. He is the perfect human to do this: RMBer as well as a forumsider. He can bring everything together. I wouldn't discourage voting for Roavin, though. He is also a perfectly competent candidate, just (in my humble view), not as competent as Aumie! I'm not flipping my vote. Wahoo!

I've also got to stop him from running for the LC somehow. He'd destroy my campaign.😛

Roavin, Aumeltopia, Lily pad nation, and William wordsworth

Horizon metrocorp wrote:Does this region have a good financial prospects?

The current LC embezzled spent all the regions savings on medical research.
















Auphelia wrote:Since the dawn of time, one question has gone unanswered:

Why do Hello Kitty bandages not heal wounds?

This question has dogged humanity for millennia. If elected to the LC I will devote every necessary and available resource to resolve this dilemma once and for all. We shall spare no expense: even if it means the local council has to sleep under benches and our delegate is reduced to living a palm-thatched cabanna on the beach. Well that or I might ineptly attempt to use one to ineffectively heal the dead in our RMB.


RESEARCH LOG:

WOUND: Gunshot/Chest Wound

Volaworand wrote:places the meat back in TSSS's gaping chest hole... and puts a hello kitty band-aid on it

RESULT: ineffective, death followed swiftly.


WOUND: Head Stabbing/Skull Fracture

Volaworand wrote:*tears off plain band-aid*

*puts on a bright pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

There! that's better.

RESULT: ineffective. Initial improved mood, followed by death. Research note: possible placebo effect?


WOUND: Psychic Wipe, Mutilation, dismemberment and extensive burns.

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink hello kitty band-aid on you.*

Are you all better now?

*nudges your mutilated burnt corpse*

*stares blankly*

RESULT: ineffective.


WOUND: Consumption of poison-laced bamboo

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your corpse*

*Pecks at your flesh to see if you are tasty or bitter*

oh... Panda! the other white meat!

*nom nom nom*

RESULT: inconclusive. Subject remained dead, but test was interrupted by subject's corpse being eaten.


WOUND: Massive Crushing Injury after being hugged by tentacled RMB goddess

Volaworand wrote:puts a bright pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your corpse.

RESULT: ineffective.


WOUND: Unspecified Gunshot wound

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid and "boo-boo healing" kiss*

Hopefully that will work? that's the extent of my first aid skills.

RESULT: ineffective. Subject remained dead.


WOUND: Massive Skull fracture

Volaworand wrote:*puts a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your cracked head*

RESULT: ineffective. it appears the band-aid was not large enough to prevent brain loss.


WOUND: Demonic possession, followed by gunshot and severe blunt force trauma wounds

Volaworand wrote:These demons are very tricky!

*checks bullet wounds... applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

I see the demon bleeding out of her body: this is a good sign!

RESULT: inconclusive. The demonic possession faded after the test subject lost consciousness prior to death.


WOUND: Sport injury. Leg pain.

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink Hello Kitty Band-aid on your leg anyway*

RESULT: inconslusive. researcher distracted by attractive nurse.


WOUND: Gunshot Resulting in Massive Cranial Trauma

Volaworand wrote:*applies the standard hot pink Hello Kitty Band-aid and boo-boo kiss*

I just don't understand why he dies? we are doing everything we can here!

RESULT: ineffective. subject remained dead.


WOUND: Revive-o-matic explosive malfunction resulting in facial burns.

Volaworand wrote:ouch! now I have to apply first aid to myself!

*applies one hot pink hello kitty band-aid to my burnt face*

RESULT: incomplete data. apparent extensive scarring, however researcher did not have baseline data on original facial features.


WOUND: Gunshot wound/shoulder

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

there you go! all better!

RESULT: ineffective. band-aid lost adhesion due to excessive blood splatter.


WOUND: Traumatic Bodily Injury/severed in two by tentacled deity

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

Did it work?

RESULT: ineffective. research note: perhaps next time apply the band-aid to remaining upper torso as opposed to severed lower etremities?


WOUND: Hugging/Massive Crushing Injury

Volaworand wrote:applies my traditional first aid by applying a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid to the crushed and gooey mess of your body.

it's never worked before... but i'm sure that this time will be the lucky one.

pecks at your lifeless corpse.

"oh no! I guess it didn't work."

drags your body over to the recycling bin... I mean, Revive-o-matic, and tosses you inside.

Does anyone have a revive-o-matic token? I'm all out!

RESULT: ineffective, lack of flat surface impeded ban-aid adhesion.


WOUND: Extraterrestrial visitation resulting Involunary Spinal Loss

Volaworand wrote:oh noes!!!

*applies the standard ineffective hot pink hello kitty band-aid*

well... I've done all I can

RESULT: ineffective. subject died in agonizing pain.


WOUND: Anaphylaxis after exposure to pro-Trump propaganda (Subject had severe allergy)

Volaworand wrote:applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid ... did it work?

RESULT: ineffective. subject suffered spontaneous illiteracy and moral blindness.


WOUND: Abdominal stabbing, followed by body being magneticly affixed to fridge as art installation

Volaworand wrote:*applies a standard Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to your gaping wounds*

This time I just know it will work.

RESULT: ineffective. subject died, researcher note: extensive blood loss made a horrible mess of the kitchen floor. potential slipping hazard.


WOUND: SPIT grenade injury

Volaworand wrote:No!!!!!!!!!!

*rushes over with a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

RESULT: ineffective. Subject died promptly. researcher note: treatment may have contributed to Shatner-esce overly dramatic death scene


WOUND: Mass RMB mutism

Volaworand wrote:*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-Aid to the dead RMB*

Hopefully this will help!

RESULT: ineffective. RMB remained mute.


WOUND: Court inducted depression

Volaworand wrote:he's been quiet and lethargic and laying around the LC offices like... well, like a slab of concrete or something.

Poor guy. :-(

*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to Concrete Slab*

RESULT: inconsulsive. band-aid fell off after several days of inactivity. body was discarded in RMB dumpster fire.


WOUND: Drowning

Volaworand wrote:hello, sir! can you hear me. My name is Volaworand and I'm trained in first aid. I'm going to check if you are breathing.

oh no!

you, in the red shirt, go call 911 and tell them we have an uncouncious male not breathing in the TSP RMB and then come back to me.
You, the fox with no pants! get me a first kit and the AED machine from the front office and bring it back to me!

*applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

well... I've done all I can.

*whistles innocently*

RESULT: inconclusive. subject began breathing, but then died from laughter. researcher note: 911 did not arrive. Never send a red shirt on an away mission.

Volaworand wrote:but did you see how that Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid brought him back from the brink of death? Our funneling all the LC funds into my medical research is clearly paying off!


WOUND: Stabbed in neck

Poleande wrote:Ouch. *Applies a Hello-Kitty Band-aid*

RESULT: ineffective. Test result discarded as treatment was not of the Hot Pink version. researcher note: Neon Yellow Hello Kitty Band-aid research has not reached clinical trials.


WOUND: Poverty induced Lack of Pebbles

Volaworand wrote:but I need those pebbles... for, um.... reasons! I'll pay you handsomely with ill gotten government funds: just bill your fee and expenses to the RMB Hello-Kitty Band-aid research slush fund.

RESULT: inconclusive. possible placebo effect. despite the non-application of treatment, symptoms are lessening.


WOUND: Facial Abrasions during street fight

Volaworand wrote:*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to TSSS's face.*

There! You should be all better now!

RESULT: inconclusive. research was interrupted by British drama

Volaworand wrote:hmmm... new season of Downton Abbey coming on... back in a while folks!


WOUND: Unemployed Swedish Fox-maid

Volaworand wrote:Just bill your hours to the LC's Hello Kitty Band-aid Medical Research Slush Fund … and don't say anything to Drystar

RESULT: inconclusive. The kitchen was cleaned, however the subject provided researcher with excessive Gin and Tonic's resulting in loss of data.



- Volaworand Newswire
Read dispatch

The Solar System Scope wrote:Hi, sweetie! *hugs*

Hi!!
*huggles*
How are you??

Horizon metrocorp

Volaworand wrote:The current LC embezzled spent the regions savings on medical research.















Auphelia wrote:Since the dawn of time, one question has gone unanswered:

Why do Hello Kitty bandages not heal wounds?

This question has dogged humanity for millennia. If elected to the LC I will devote every necessary and available resource to resolve this dilemma once and for all. We shall spare no expense: even if it means the local council has to sleep under benches and our delegate is reduced to living a palm-thatched cabanna on the beach. Well that or I might ineptly attempt to use one to ineffectively heal the dead in our RMB.


RESEARCH LOG:

WOUND: Gunshot/Chest Wound

Volaworand wrote:places the meat back in TSSS's gaping chest hole... and puts a hello kitty band-aid on it

RESULT: ineffective, death followed swiftly.


WOUND: Head Stabbing/Skull Fracture

Volaworand wrote:*tears off plain band-aid*

*puts on a bright pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

There! that's better.

RESULT: ineffective. Initial improved mood, followed by death. Research note: possible placebo effect?


WOUND: Psychic Wipe, Mutilation, dismemberment and extensive burns.

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink hello kitty band-aid on you.*

Are you all better now?

*nudges your mutilated burnt corpse*

*stares blankly*

RESULT: ineffective.


WOUND: Consumption of poison-laced bamboo

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your corpse*

*Pecks at your flesh to see if you are tasty or bitter*

oh... Panda! the other white meat!

*nom nom nom*

RESULT: inconclusive. Subject remained dead, but test was interrupted by subject's corpse being eaten.


WOUND: Massive Crushing Injury after being hugged by tentacled RMB goddess

Volaworand wrote:puts a bright pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your corpse.

RESULT: ineffective.


WOUND: Unspecified Gunshot wound

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid and "boo-boo healing" kiss*

Hopefully that will work? that's the extent of my first aid skills.

RESULT: ineffective. Subject remained dead.


WOUND: Massive Skull fracture

Volaworand wrote:*puts a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid on your cracked head*

RESULT: ineffective. it appears the band-aid was not large enough to prevent brain loss.


WOUND: Demonic possession, followed by gunshot and severe blunt force trauma wounds

Volaworand wrote:These demons are very tricky!

*checks bullet wounds... applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

I see the demon bleeding out of her body: this is a good sign!

RESULT: inconclusive. The demonic possession faded after the test subject lost consciousness prior to death.


WOUND: Sport injury. Leg pain.

Volaworand wrote:*puts a bright pink Hello Kitty Band-aid on your leg anyway*

RESULT: inconslusive. researcher distracted by attractive nurse.


WOUND: Gunshot Resulting in Massive Cranial Trauma

Volaworand wrote:*applies the standard hot pink Hello Kitty Band-aid and boo-boo kiss*

I just don't understand why he dies? we are doing everything we can here!

RESULT: ineffective. subject remained dead.


WOUND: Revive-o-matic explosive malfunction resulting in facial burns.

Volaworand wrote:ouch! now I have to apply first aid to myself!

*applies one hot pink hello kitty band-aid to my burnt face*

RESULT: incomplete data. apparent extensive scarring, however researcher did not have baseline data on original facial features.


WOUND: Gunshot wound/shoulder

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

there you go! all better!

RESULT: ineffective. band-aid lost adhesion due to excessive blood splatter.


WOUND: Traumatic Bodily Injury/severed in two by tentacled deity

Volaworand wrote:*applies a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid*

Did it work?

RESULT: ineffective. research note: perhaps next time apply the band-aid to remaining upper torso as opposed to severed lower etremities?


WOUND: Hugging/Massive Crushing Injury

Volaworand wrote:applies my traditional first aid by applying a hot pink Hello Kitty band-aid to the crushed and gooey mess of your body.

it's never worked before... but i'm sure that this time will be the lucky one.

pecks at your lifeless corpse.

"oh no! I guess it didn't work."

drags your body over to the recycling bin... I mean, Revive-o-matic, and tosses you inside.

Does anyone have a revive-o-matic token? I'm all out!

RESULT: ineffective, lack of flat surface impeded ban-aid adhesion.


WOUND: Extraterrestrial visitation resulting Involunary Spinal Loss

Volaworand wrote:oh noes!!!

*applies the standard ineffective hot pink hello kitty band-aid*

well... I've done all I can

RESULT: ineffective. subject died in agonizing pain.


WOUND: Anaphylaxis after exposure to pro-Trump propaganda (Subject had severe allergy)

Volaworand wrote:applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid ... did it work?

RESULT: ineffective. subject suffered spontaneous illiteracy and moral blindness.


WOUND: Abdominal stabbing, followed by body being magneticly affixed to fridge as art installation

Volaworand wrote:*applies a standard Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to your gaping wounds*

This time I just know it will work.

RESULT: ineffective. subject died, researcher note: extensive blood loss made a horrible mess of the kitchen floor. potential slipping hazard.


WOUND: SPIT grenade injury

Volaworand wrote:No!!!!!!!!!!

*rushes over with a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

RESULT: ineffective. Subject died promptly. researcher note: treatment may have contributed to Shatner-esce overly dramatic death scene


WOUND: Mass RMB mutism

Volaworand wrote:*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-Aid to the dead RMB*

Hopefully this will help!

RESULT: ineffective. RMB remained mute.


WOUND: Court inducted depression

Volaworand wrote:he's been quiet and lethargic and laying around the LC offices like... well, like a slab of concrete or something.

Poor guy. :-(

*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to Concrete Slab*

RESULT: inconsulsive. band-aid fell off after several days of inactivity. body was discarded in RMB dumpster fire.


WOUND: Drowning

Volaworand wrote:hello, sir! can you hear me. My name is Volaworand and I'm trained in first aid. I'm going to check if you are breathing.

oh no!

you, in the red shirt, go call 911 and tell them we have an uncouncious male not breathing in the TSP RMB and then come back to me.
You, the fox with no pants! get me a first kit and the AED machine from the front office and bring it back to me!

*applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid*

well... I've done all I can.

*whistles innocently*

RESULT: inconclusive. subject began breathing, but then died from laughter. researcher note: 911 did not arrive. Never send a red shirt on an away mission.

Volaworand wrote:but did you see how that Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid brought him back from the brink of death? Our funneling all the LC funds into my medical research is clearly paying off!


WOUND: Stabbed in neck

Poleande wrote:Ouch. *Applies a Hello-Kitty Band-aid*

RESULT: ineffective. Test result discarded as treatment was not of the Hot Pink version. researcher note: Neon Yellow Hello Kitty Band-aid research has not reached clinical trials.


WOUND: Poverty induced Lack of Pebbles

Volaworand wrote:but I need those pebbles... for, um.... reasons! I'll pay you handsomely with ill gotten government funds: just bill your fee and expenses to the RMB Hello-Kitty Band-aid research slush fund.

RESULT: inconclusive. possible placebo effect. despite the non-application of treatment, symptoms are lessening.


WOUND: Facial Abrasions during street fight

Volaworand wrote:*Applies a Hot Pink Hello Kitty Band-aid to TSSS's face.*

There! You should be all better now!

RESULT: inconclusive. research was interrupted by British drama

Volaworand wrote:hmmm... new season of Downton Abbey coming on... back in a while folks!


WOUND: Unemployed Swedish Fox-maid

Volaworand wrote:Just bill your hours to the LC's Hello Kitty Band-aid Medical Research Slush Fund … and don't say anything to Drystar

RESULT: inconclusive. The kitchen was cleaned, however the subject provided researcher with excessive Gin and Tonic's resulting in loss of data.



- Volaworand Newswire
Read dispatch

Well that's not good, we are a cultural exchange training and recruitment corporation, we work with governments and other companies, in order to fill labour force numbers or help with specialised training.

For Example, our staff could train your people to work in Agalaesia and vice versa, same goes for say if
Agalaesia weakest economic sector is engineering, we would be able to pay you ourselves to train their engineers to a higher standard and vice versa.

Of course it would be cheaper for both nations to contract us to do this recruitment and training, it would be cheaper all around.

Something very sketchy going on with the vote right now... a bunch of new nations immediately joined the WA after founding and then voted for Roavin without doing anything else. We're looking into it.

Roavin, The sk8ing unicorn, Volaworand, Lazarene ryccia, and 3 othersLily pad nation, Agalaesia, and Rivierenland

The sk8ing unicorn

I managed to endorse 289 nations before the SWAN bot even noticed me, how's that for endotarting? :P
I should go for the top 10 this month. Haha

Horizon metrocorp

Aumeltopia wrote:Something very sketchy going on with the vote right now... a bunch of new nations immediately joined the WA after founding and then voted for Roavin without doing anything else. We're looking into it.

What if it's just coincidence and your pre judging the situation? 🤔 they could be innocent

Quiescent and Rivierenland

Aumeltopia wrote:Something very sketchy going on with the vote right now... a bunch of new nations immediately joined the WA after founding and then voted for Roavin without doing anything else. We're looking into it.

I've gotta say, TSP elections are way more exciting than European elections

The Solar System Scope, The sk8ing unicorn, Volaworand, William wordsworth, and 1 otherHorizon metrocorp

«12. . .20,19620,19720,19820,19920,20020,20120,202. . .64,20164,202»

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Providence: The new novel by Max Barry, creator of NationStates