The Republic of Fake communism85 is a colossal, efficient nation, renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, disturbing lack of elderly people, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.55 billion Fake communism85ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 55.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Fake communism85ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,366 trillion lire a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an amazing 208,683 lire, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.6 times as much as the poorest.

Dreams of entering the Super League have been relegated to the history books, code enforcement officers circle wealthy Fake communism85ians like vultures, the new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play, and fans doing the wave routinely disrupt the finals of Go tournaments. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Fake communism85's national animal is the unicorn, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Fake communism85 is ranked 273,768^th in the world and 10,145^th in Lazarus for Most Primitive, scoring -265.5 on the Scary Big Number Scale.