The Impractical Matriarchy of Eyluvmenia is a huge, cultured nation, ruled by Lukas Håkonsøn with an even hand, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, avowedly heterosexual populace, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, democratic, humorless population of 757 million Luvs have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of All-Knowing Sight Organ. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 64.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Luv economy, worth 106 trillion Bouncy Balls a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Trout Farming. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 140,491 Bouncy Balls, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 444,041 per year while the poor average 33,938, a ratio of 13.1 to 1.

Nations that kill a Luv can expect a strongly worded letter, airport announcements inform passengers that flights have been delayed because pilots are having afternoon naps, political shows are fit for purpose, and little children cry as their rainbow drawings are seized by the Straight-Thought Police. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eyluvmenia's national animal is the Goblin.

Eyluvmenia is ranked 210,620^th in the world and 3,169^th in the West Pacific for Safest, scoring 36.31 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.