The Big Soft Paws of Adaia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by a furry with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 30.784 billion Adaians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Shimooooka. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Adaian economy, worth an astonishing 13,899 trillion abominations a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 451,531 abominations, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,456,227 per year while the poor average 16,024, a ratio of 215 to 1.

A widely accepted trade policy is "tit-for-tat", citizens need a magnifying glass and color chart to distinguish between nearly identical brand labels, new pilots are regularly reminded that they are more expendable than their planes, and the tools of the trade for landmine clearance appear to be copious amounts of gasoline and a box of matches. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Adaia's national animal is the colourless green idea, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is 2-Tone.

Adaia is ranked 286,498^th in the world and 3,731^st in the West Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -478.45 on the Scary Big Number Scale.