The Incorporated States of Alestadpolkhbizzydor is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Joseph Stalin with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, strictly enforced bedtime, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.745 billion Alestadpolkhbizzydorians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda, while Social Policy and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alestadpolkhbizzydor City. The average income tax rate is 83.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Alestadpolkhbizzydorian economy, worth 384 trillion Florins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 220,183 Florins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

The government merely pays lip service to Communism, the meaning of life was recently discovered in the patch notes for Version 1.42, the path to inner peace is paved with state-mandated punishment, and the nation's faithful often say there is a higher power watching over them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Alestadpolkhbizzydor's national animal is the Dragon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Communism.

Alestadpolkhbizzydor is ranked 120,591^st in the world and 2,517^th in The North Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 1,085.12 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.